Goodbye Is Not The Right Word...

Today, was by far, the hardest day of my life. I cried, and laughed, and cried some more. The funeral was enormous. There were enough people to fill a small town. The lives touched by this guy spread from young people, to old. Most of you that will read this blog know exactly what I am talking about. But in case you have never heard the background story of how Anthony (Tony) Melton and I became friends, I'll go into a little detail.

Nearly 6 or 7 years ago now, I went to a church called First Baptist Church of Gilmer. All of my friends at the time went, and it was just a great place. Little did I know that the summer before my 6th or 7th grade year, I would be going to what was called the "Jr. High Retreat," where we would gather with older students and discuss how our faith could impact people at school; how we could spiritually bond with one another, and just overall have a good time. I get to my sponsor house for the weekend with about 10 other guys. Our group leader: Tony Melton. High School, trumpet player in the band, and all around, one of the most awesome guys I have ever come to meet. We never really got to be great friends here, but I always looked up to him from then on. He was the guy that I looked up to spiritually.

Fast forward to my 10th grade year, and Tony records a CD. Closet of Confessions. I, being the one looking up to him, had to have it. I sent him a Myspace message, and asked how much they were. He said 5 dollars would be fine. So the next day at school, with 5 dollars in my pocket all day, I finally met up with him in the parking lot and got the CD. He said not to worry about the money, that it was OK. I gave him the 5 anyway. And he took it like it or not.

To this day, his lyrics are STILL the best I have heard. They almost seem so strategic, and make you want more. His lyrics remind me of Andrew McMahon of Jack's Mannequin. They were the only lyrics I ever felt deeply about. Cared enough to look into them and try to understand the meaning, and come out with an answer that was just mind blowing. They were truly amazing lyrics.

Anyway, I had a band at the time named The Deathstar Shakedown. Was just kind of a project that me and a few friends were working on, when we just one day stopped playing. Soon after, I was asked by my (for lack of a better word here) idol, Tony Melton to be in his band. This was literally equivalent to your biggest name and favorite artist asking you to sing with them on stage. It was literally a dream come true. I squeeed with delight.

Our first practice, I learned nearly 3 songs that were on the CD that I loved. I couldn't stop smiling. And that happened for the next year and a half when we played. Then we would make our own music. And it actually sounded really good in my opinion. Song after song, we would tinker around with them for days, until we found something that we liked the best. The 4 group members named the band Primary. Primary consumed me for about a year and a half, and within this time period, I had the most amazing times.

Recorded an EP. This was honestly the best week of my life. I couldn't imagine life any other way or without these 3 other people. My bandmates. My second family. We were all brothers. And when that CD came out, I believe that we were the happiest people on that planet. When we saw our music turn into art, and be put out there for the world to see... We were killing it, and it was amazing.

Battle of the Bands. For a band from some town that cared more about football than they did their student's grades, and win the first round of the battle was insane for us. We were kings. Nothing could stop us. We worked solid for the next few weeks perfecting every detail of our songs and went to play at The Door in Dallas, Tx. We may have lost, but it was as if that stage became our home there. It was so comfortable. the 4 of us doing what we loved, and having people cheer along. That was perfection in it's finest.

We camped out at Caddo lake, and if I would have missed that for some stupid reason, I don't know how I could have lived with myself. 3 days full of making music. Hanging out. Being friends. The best of friends. A family. We traveled around.. Even went to Louisiana for food, just because we could. We were adventurous.

I found out that one of my best friends and idols died early on a Sunday morning. He was in a car wreck. I was to be a Pallbearer. The honor that lifted through me at that moment was beyond earthly. I felt like a King. Primary may physically be down in people, but Primary is more than a band. It is a family. Tony, Daniel, Jared, and Myself. We may not always get along, but we all loved each other no matter what happened. Tony made me a better person today because he cared and loved me, just as Primary did for him. Every single day, I will think about him, but not every day will I cry. His spirit keeps me going, and I can feel him pushing me onward saying that "EVERYTHING will be alright." Everything will be alright Tony. I want you to know that if by some chance you catch glimpse of this in Heaven, Everything is alright. You are my Hero.

I'll see you soon brother.

It is well with my soul.